· By Justine Vallata
Forget The Ex With My Top 5 Heartbreak Remedy Gift Ideas
Flowers won't mend a broken heart.
But epic orgasms might!
Breakups are the worst.
Even the amicable ones are a bag of dicks!
No offence to penis owners.
If you're recently single or you're someone's shoulder to cry on, invest in self-love. While I'm sure there are plenty more fish in the sea, for now there's also vibrators.
It's time to let the endorphins work their magic.
Here Are My Top 5 Breakup Gifts
(gin + peen candy + gasms = heart mended)
Romance is Dead is the ultimate bestie-to-bestie vibrating gifting experience. We bundle a high-performing silicone Pleasure Pal vibe of your choice with BABY Pink Gin, Hard Candy penis sweets and our top two self-love essentials - That's The Spot's The Hero water-based lubricant and The Sidekick toy cleaning foam.
Romance is Dead is the perfect break up, cheer up, 'happy birthday mate' or 'gosh I'm a LOL friend' prezzie pack. Don't hold back, your bestie wants to be gifted a vibrator and this is your sign to step up and gift them one!
Inside every lush pack you will find:
- A Pleasure Pal (Pal, charger, storage bag, Pal bookmark and gift box)
- 200ml bottle of BABY Pink Gin (which stays pink when you mix it, so lush!)
- That's The Spot The Hero water based lubricant 100ml
- That's The Spot The Sidekick foam toy cleaner 100ml
- Paloma Candy Hard Candy cube (yes, it's a little box of dicks)
"Newly single after a very long relationship and I wasn’t sure where to start. That’s The Spot’s website was great at explaining each item’s features. Delivery was super quick and the packaging was very cute."
- Bec, NSW
(the ultimate self-care bundle)
The name says it all. Me Time for you or Me Time for someone you think is thumbs up amazing. This gift pack is everything we love to enjoy when we're alone.
- A Pleasure Pal (Pal, charger, storage bag, Pal bookmark and gift box)
- Freckleberry 150g milk chocolate freckles grab bag
- Undercover Roasters 20% Cocoa Drinking Chocolate 250g
- Lula Self Warming Eye Mask 5 pack rose scented
Send the ultimate time-out to someone who needs it.
(aka the good kind of prick)
Turn that frown upside down, have a laugh and treat yourself or someone you click with to their very own lovable Spike.
Spike is the ultimate cool factor Pleasure Pal, effortlessly camouflaging in your loungeroom as a decorative accent. But Spike also knows how to read a room. When the mood is right, Spike is ready to turn on. Spike's cactus shape offers soft external vibrations and provides stimulation for all levels of self-love exploration.
Spike's arms and main tip can be creatively used for clitoral, perineum and anal play.Â
- Cool and functional, Spike is the kind of prick you want in your life (bye bye bad pricks)
- USB / In-line charge (no more yuck bats)
- 10 vibration frequencies, three continuous vibration speeds (for max prickle tickle)
- A+ clitoral, perineum and anal stimulation options (yippee, a vibrator for everyBODY)Â
"My friend was going through a divorce, so a group of us all pitched in and sent her a That's The Spot pack. She called me laughing and said it was the first thing that had made her smile in a while. This is so much more than sending a vibrator - thanks for your wonderful service and amazing gifts!"
- Jodi, QLDÂ
Rose Lula Self-Warming Eye Mask 5 Pack, $29.99
(the perfect remedy to post-cry puffy eyes)
Mmm a warm hug for your eyes and mind.Â
Rest your eyes and mind with Australia’s first self-warming, scented eye masks. When you open a Lula Eye Mask the magical self-warming process begins! This five pack means multiple opportunities to zone out and zen out.
'Single Looks Good On You' Card by Bad On Paper, $6.50
(could there be a more perfect card?)
Single Looks Good On You - hell yeah it does!
Vibrators are the ultimate break-up prezzie. Take your gift to the next level with this cute AF greeting card. If you're sending some post-break-up vibrator cheer to your bestie, your cuz, colleague or mum, adding this Bad On Paper card is a MUST!Â